Part II: Trouble brewing working with a colleague

Dear Office-Politics,

It is important to the harmony of the work place in our department to work in collaboration with other assistants within the department. One of my colleagues confided in me that they are having difficulty working with another colleague. How should I handle this situation?

Team-worker

OFFICE-POLITICS REPLY BY PETER GARBER

Dear Team-worker

Some people have trouble dealing with interpersonal conflicts and need help in this area. I suspect that your colleague is having this problem.

I also think that this person told you about this situation in hopes that you will help him or her with this problem. Perhaps ask your colleague more about this situation and suggest possible ways that he/she could deal more effectively with this other person.

Sometimes, it is easier for someone else outside of the immediate situation to see what needs to be done to resolve interpersonal problems at work. An alternative might be to suggest that your colleague seek advice from your Human Resource Department or some other qualified resource available.

Thanks for writing to Office-Politics.

Regards,

Peter Garber, Author

Peter R. Garber has worked as an HR professional for over 25 years and is the author of many business books including: Winning the Rat Race at Work and 100 Ways to Get on the Wrong Side of your Boss.

Revolving door position: Is it me or them?

Dear Office-Politics, Our office has a new staff member who has been with us for 1 month. She was hired to fill a highly demanding position. She is very good in this position and we would hate to lose her, as she is the 4th person to take this job in a 1 year period. Since she was hired, she has stated repeatedly that she could get another job anytime she wanted, and has quit 3 times. We managed to talk her into staying, but I feel as if we are being held hostage. She is what I would term a high maintenance employee who requires constant validation of her work, and refuses to accept correction. If she makes a request for material, or procedural changes it must be done immediately, or we are being "difficult and unhelpful". The last time that she "quit" she came ...

Age-related disabilities bring out the bullies

Dear Office-Politics, I was a successful executive in high tech companies for 15 years. About 7 years ago I started my own small company which now has 4 employees. As a small company we can’t afford to pay the highest salaries, but I try to create a great work environment with great benefits and lots of flexibility. One of my employees, John, (who is also a friend) is in his early 60’s and has a variety of aged related health problems and disabilities which he did not perceive or disclose at the time he was hired 3 years ago. For example, although he was hired for his IT and technical support skills, he can’t read the type on a computer screen unless the font sizes are turned WAY UP. All the windows and blinds in the office that he is in have to be closed ...

Fear that new promotion sets me up as target

Dear Office-Politics, I am hoping you can offer some advice for my situation. I have been at my current job for a year. I previously worked in the same field using the same software. This was a big advantage for me since there was not much need for training. I am a hard working employee and consider myself a team player. I work with an attitude of what is best for the company. If the company does not do well then I will be out of a job. Recently I was told by my boss that he is planning on switching my job duties with another employee which in turn will make me her boss. My boss feels I am better qualified and has made comments about the other employee being in over her head. I do not have a problem with the switch in duties, I am however concerned about ...

I am in HR but the irony is, I am bad at dealing with people

Dear Office-Politics Veterans, I am in an HR-related role but the irony is, I am bad at dealing with people. Here's my situation... My colleagues have seen HR as an avenue to test waters for challenging the management's policies or practices. More often, i'm in a difficult role as i can't reveal the management's decision & any confidential information. However, the informal politics here is vibrant & i am seen as the free-loafer of information instead of a contributor. Not that it matters but it has seriously affected my work. One of the Accounts officer has been telling tales whenever there are differences in policies being applied for different staff. However on a HR point of view, it is due to entitlements that are sometimes inherent to the particular employee which we are informed not to reveal as to the exceptional policies applied. The impact of such informal complaints about HR being ...

Can I trust my Bosses when they are all having extramarital affairs?

Dear Office-Politics, I've been dealing with a situation at work that's recently come to a head. Our company is only 9 people large, and of those 9 people we've got two VPs and one President. Several months ago, the President and the female VP owned up to being in a relationship, which we long suspected was the reason for the breakup of his marriage. As if that relationship being in our faces all day wasn't enough to deal with, the male VP admitted this past week that he is having an affair with the contact of our biggest client. He claims his wife knows and is OK with it, but his two young children will never know. I have just recently (literally, 5 days ago) gotten a raise I have worked very hard for, thus don't want to leave my position, but this is all becoming too much for someone who ...

Blame rolls down hill pretty quickly here

Dear Office-Politics, Any suggestions for dealing with multiple layers of upper management that are rarely on the same page? Blame rolls down hill pretty quickly here and disputes among them are often resolved by pinning the blame on people down the chain. The 3 layers of upper management have been friends for many years and all have stubborn, difficult, and in some cases abusive tendencies towards the staff. I like the work, pay, projects we work on, people I manage directly but feel like the concerns I've raised in this area have been turned around and held against me. HR seems genuinely afraid of the owner, so I'm not sure there's much help there and I get the sense that going that route might be held against me as well. It's been suggested that reducing my role in management might help which I see as a disaster for the group. I'm ...

The Office-Politics Letters that appears as a feature of this Website are an educational and discussion oriented column designed to help the reader better understand ethical issues. The matters discussed in the letter are reviewed in a summary and abbreviated way and are only meant to foster thinking on the part of the reader. If a person decides to adopt or implement suggestions, they do so at their own risk. No representation or warranty is provided in relation to suggestions or the contents of the advice letter. Neither the authors of the advice letter, Franke James, John W. Burton, Rick Brandon, Marty Seldman, Timothy Johnson, Jennifer Glueck Bezoza, Gregory Ketchum, Erika Andersen, past advisers, guest advisers or the owners of this Website accept any liability whatsoever for any opinions expressed in the letter or for errors and omissions. All submissions to www.officepolitics.com will remain anonymous. No email addresses or identifying names will be published. Submission of letters to the Office-Politics Forum grants the Publisher, Nerdheaven Ltd. the right to reproduce, republish, repurpose and excerpt the submission in any and all other media, without compensation or contacting the author. Copyright The James Gang, Iconoclasts Inc., 2002-2026.