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A new younger colleague joined our hardworking team... The problem? He seems to expect praise all the time...
About a year ago, a new younger colleague joined our small and very hardworking team. He possesses a master's, is multilingual and is most charming.
The problem? He seems to expect praise all the time, and has difficulty
dealing with negative feedback. Especially if it's serious or substantive.
Thanks for keeping my identity secret and not identifying me publicly.
Your help will be appreciated.
Dear Not charmed,
It is always difficult to give negative feedback to someone whom you have no authority over. It's called influencing without authority. Your situation has been made even more difficult by the fact that this colleague is not receptive to hearing any constructive feedback about his work. In fact, he has even taken measures to turn this feedback against you.
This is a tough situation to be sure. I'm wondering how others feel about this guy? Are they just as frustrated as you? If so, this situation may get addressed on its own without your direct involvement so you don't have to be the "bad guy" so to speak. Here's what it sounds like is the real problem. This guy shows up a year ago, charms his way out doing any real work, won't accept any feedback about his lack cooperation and you get stuck fixing everything he messes up. You could try to address this problem by one of the following approaches:
However, a word of caution - he may have already charmed the higher ups in the organization to think that he is best thing that ever happened to the organization and is carrying the workload for all of you. If this is the case, and none of the above works for you, then you may have to bury the hatchet and learn to work with his mediocre work, unwillingness to accept feedback and pettiness. In your letter you say that you like this individual and want to communicate better with him. If this is the case, then you will need to put the problems you have had in the past with this individual behind you, accept things the way the are with this guy and move ahead.
Thanks for writing to Office-Politics.
Feedback from Not Charmed:
Thank you very much! Straightforward, practical advice that I'm studying and will seek to apply. I really appreciate you taking the time to consider my imbroglio and for writing me.
Office-Politics Review: 100 Ways to Get on the Wrong Side of Your Boss
100 Ways to Get on the Wrong Side of Your Boss by Peter R. Garber is an entertaining and humorous read designed to help you improve your relationship with your Boss. Garber, who is the author of over 40 books, draws on his 25-years experience as a Human Resources Professional, to give readers ‘tips on how to deal with difficult bosses’. He says, “The challenge is to find ways to deal with even the most difficult bosses you may have to work for during your career.” Read the full review
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