\n
![\"timothy](\"\/images\/johnson.jpg\")
<\/p>\nDear My-terrible-mistake,<\/p>\n
Can you come over for poker night? I really need to win back a few hands, and I think you\u2019re just the person to help me. <\/p>\n
When it comes to matters of \u201cwhat might occur professionally\u201d it is always wise to divulge very little (translated: ABSOLUTELY NOTHING) to those around you. \u201cConfiding in a Coworker\u201d is a myth, and it generally has all the success of a Bigfoot sighting. There are times I will let information out, simply because I live in a (professionally) small town and I want to see how the information will flow back to me. However, the really, really, really important things (like other people want to hire me for $40K more than you\u2019re paying me) are generally taboo. So, what to do now that you\u2019ve spilled the beans? There are two things you need to do and neither of them involves the deceptive coworker (other than: I\u2019ve hope we\u2019ve all learned a valuable lesson here\u2026 you fill in the blanks):<\/p>\n
1) You still have a degree of power based on your success with your current accounts. Protect that, as it is now your most valued resource. You\u2019ve lost some \u201cface\u201d in the eyes of your boss, and so you will need to work to regain his trust and confidence.<\/p>\n
2) Talk to your boss. He now knows the score, but you need to do some perception-fixing. You should emphasize that you chose him (and your current company) over considerably higher pay, and he needs to realize that. Since he knows you\u2019ve bad-mouthed his management style, use it as a coaching moment. Apologize for not sharing the feedback with him directly, and reiterate the feedback. Emphasize that you both have choices to make: you can let this come between you, or you can use it as a growth experience to strengthen your relationship. If somebody is playing on a logical and moral field, then your sincere humility should eventually be rewarded\u2026 BUT, you\u2019ve got to EARN back the trust.<\/p>\n
As for your co-worker, reputation has a funny way of catching up to people. I hope this helps.<\/p>\n
Thank you for writing Office Politics.<\/p>\n
Best wishes,<\/p>\n
Timothy Johnson, Author<\/p>\n
Timothy Johnson<\/a> is the author of the newly released Gust: The “Tale” Wind of Office Politics<\/a> (Lexicon, 2007) as well as Race Through The Forest \u2013 A Project Management Fable (Tiberius, 2006). As Chief Accomplishment Officer for his company, Carpe Factum, Inc. (Latin for \u201cSeize The Accomplishment\u201d), he also is a dynamic speaker, providing keynotes and workshops on the accomplishment-oriented topics of project management, creativity, process improvement, systems thinking, and (of course) office politics. His consulting clients have crossed multiple industries and have included Wells Fargo, Harley-Davidson, ING, Teva NeuroScience, and Principal Financial Group. In addition to writing, consulting, speaking, and coaching, he is also an adjunct instructor for Drake University\u2019s MBA program in Des Moines Iowa, teaching classes in Project Management, Creativity for Business, and Managing Office Politics.<\/em><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" Dear Office-Politics, I am a senior manager in a rather isolated, though lucrative section of a small company. I have recently been recruited for two other jobs that pay at least $40,000 more than my current pay. Unfortunately I did not accept either position because I did not want to move. However I made the […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-71","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-office-politics"],"aioseo_notices":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.officepolitics.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/71","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.officepolitics.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.officepolitics.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.officepolitics.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.officepolitics.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=71"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.officepolitics.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/71\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.officepolitics.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=71"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.officepolitics.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=71"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.officepolitics.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=71"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}